me: I'm congested
mom: Oh I know what to do. You boil water and put salt in there and then inhale the fumes.
me: did you make that up?
mom: NO! I read it on the internet. I'm an internet woman.

Me: Yeah, ok, but then what?

Mom: Then they went to West Windsor and had babies like diarrhea.

Mom:let's go chewbacca.

Me: what?

Mom: don't you want to be called chewbacca?

Where's the dog? Probably masturbating...